Regrets?!

Ok, it is 3 am and I awoke to tears streaming down my face.

(Never go to sleep watching Oprah!!) :)

I know we will have regrets, but I have realized something... I want to have as few as possible. This to me, like everything I do, is something I need to find the balance in. I usually jump in feet first and go, go, go. Over the last few years I have become hindered some where.

Today was one of the moments that if you could redo you would.

Hannah had a half day today... "Mom can we stop at the library today?"

Oh, as I type this out, oh, I feel like such a heel!!!

My answer was "No, not today. I have a class in a few hours and we have to much to do at home."

So not Ok! Oh, so not ok!

There is so much more than just this moment. I have recently visited a blog, not expecting to find what I found. A Mom of a little girl named Hannah, who does not have the chance to take her Hannah to library one more time. I know we can not live in the fear of no more tomorrow. We can not live our lives with the regret, or saying tomorrow, tomorrow. So... things will have to change!! Believe me... they will!

This has been a very hard few months, deciding, changing, figuring out priorities (the ones that really matter) and... :) The tears are a sign of that change and working through it all.

Ok, now that I have gotten that out of my system... hehehe

We WILL be going to the library today!!!

(I even went in and sat with Hannah for a few minutes hugged her, kissed her, and whispered in her ear, I love you sweety a million times. Poor thing!) :)

Thank you for listening and please make sure to give someone you love a hug today.

Monday Maintenance

Ok, I won't be getting to anything at home for Maintenance Monday... but does this count, I will be finishing up the paper that was due yesterday and starting the "Big" one that is due this coming weekend. Can you say, procrastinate!! I have a lot of anxiety when I write, grammar, punctuation, my thoughts are so jumbled, lack of organizational skills and the list goes on. I am seriously thinking about starting over my English classes. My teachers were not the best and I don't know that I really learned what I needed to know.

My first teacher was more interested in our "feelings" in our writing and my next class, well that teacher made me cry! Ugghh!! Yep, that's right, she made me cry. I already had some anxiety and the teacher I began the class with quit after 5 weeks and the new teacher was full of herself. I explained my anxiety to her and asked if she was willing to help me with some extra guidance. HA!!! She told me what did I think, was I still in kindergarten, did I want her to write my papers for me, all the work you have done for the last 5 weeks I am not counting and you will have to redo it all... and this was in front of the entire class, hence the tears. Why do people like that even teach?!

Anyways, see what I mean by my thoughts being all over the place... ;) If you read this blog, you know what I am talking about. :) Anyways, just in case I dont make back on here to tell you all... Have a great Thanksgiving and enjoy one another!

I am so thankful that I have met you all and consider myself very blessed!

God Bless and Happy Thanksgiving!

Courage...

This morning I was lucky enough to be clicking through the channel and catch an interview with one of my favorite people in our world... Dr. Maya Angelou.

"Without courage, we cannot practice any other virtue with consistency." Dr. Maya Angelou This has to be one of my favorite quotes of hers. She spoke about finding the courage to ask a stranger "their name", not Billy, Bob, or Sally, but "their name". To remember that strangers name and to use that name the next time you come across them or call on them and it will show them that they are remembered. How Wonderful... we all want to be remembered.

What a wise and articulate women. I hope to achieve even a 10th of her wisdom and courage.

Happy Birthday Dr. Maya Angelou!!

I lost a week... anybody seen it, if so can I have it back, PLEASE!!

Hannah's Tropical Island

You may detect my need for an extra week... :) I was checking my school assignments and realized the paper I have been avoiding ( I am to write on a country's development potential and discuss that potential using concepts we've covered in class)is due this Sunday, not next Sunday. Holy Moly!! is right!! On top of that, I have 2 ;literature reviews due the week after Thanksgiving. So, I know what I will be doing over Thanksgiving break... :) I never knew it got harder as you go, lol, now that is funny!


I still am finding time to vent to you all though, hehehehe. This is my saving grace right now. Suck it up and take deep breath, I keep telling myself. Hannah keeps drawing me pictures of the water and tropical islands, trying to help me relax. :) OK, I am done venting and will get back to it. Maybe I will go vacuum the floor and mop, that always relaxes me... ok, yes I am still in avoidance mode!!!

Have a fabulous day!!!

eat.... pray... love

I can not believe I have read anything besides Grade 2 books and College textbooks, but I made myself and what a great book. Now for my disclaimer: this book isn't for everyone (there are some off-color moments and words), but I would recommend this book to anyone who has been through divorce or a break up or looking for "stillness".

I have always had a wandering soul and would love to travel more of this wonderful world and some day Todd and I will. :) This book is about a women's journey (travels too) after the loss of a marriage and a relationship after the marriage and she is looking for... what is she looking for? As you read this book you will know. :) (I am not giving anything away... that should show how much I think you should read it. :))

Side note: Debi you came to my mind and heart several times throughout this book and I hope you are able to find the time to read it. Great book!!

Enjoy!

P.S. If you do read it, please leave me a post.

Synchronicity... I love it when this happens!

Ok, this may only be funny to me, but... I turned on Oprah at 6 pm (TIVO'd it) , after all my household stuff was done of course, and they were talking about being still, then I post the last post about being still, then I go down my list of favorites, and whammo, Christina's latest post is "Being Still". I heard it loud and clear tonight... I need to be still!!! I am still laughing with joy and so glad that synchronicity is happening.

Just wanted to share! :)

Books... Reading... so much more!

Hi Ladies and Gents!! We wanted to check in and say "HI!". Life is busy, busy and busy.... (putting on the breaks) Wait a minute, :) Hannah has been struggling with her reading and it hit me in more ways than one. I need to read more, more than school books, I need to feed my soul right now, not only for me, but for my family. Of course I picked up my bible, then I bought some books which are helping me to help Hannah, and then I bought 2 pleasure books.





Two quotes that have stood out to me recently were, “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10) and the second (and please forgive me I am not sure who said this), "Being still is the only religion." So, I need to be still. I got it! I heard it! I am going to do it! Oh yeah, someone told me about a yoga class, going to sign up for that! Be still!!



I have some big decisions coming up and I am seeing how being still will help me in making those decisions. I will be honest with all of my fellow bloggin friends :), I am getting a little nervous... I am coming to a stage of change and accomplishment that I have never experienced and it is a little (not scary, not uneasiness) perplexing (?).

WOW-WEE!!! Anyways, watching Oprah today and I heard something fun to do and I hope you all will give this a try with me. :)

Journaling...

(The author of "Eat, Pray, Love" suggested to do this and I am going to give it a try!)

Questions to ask yourself and journal:

1. What do you really, really, really want?

2. Happiest Moment of the day.

3. Change your mantra. (We all have one, good or bad, but it is time for change. :))

Have a fabulous weekend and will see you all next week! :)

Sending Good Thoughts and Lots of Love your way!

Question of the day. :)

VS.

Ok, it might not be the question of the day, but it is my question for today. I was just asked this question in my Human Geography Class and the answers are very interesting. So, I thought, "it would be interesting to hear from my blog friends on this topic", cause I do consider you all to the most intelligent and amazing people. :)(Really I do!)

Q. Which do you believe has a greater impact on diffusing popular culture, television or the internet, and why?

I will post my answer and a few of my classmates this evening... very interesting. :)

Have a fabulous day everyone!

Who Knew?!

I am on top of it with being so far from it... :) This is a subject that is on everyones minds, but mark Oct. 15th and post a little something about helping our World.

This Great Universe

Crystalline Chapel, located in Chihuahua, Mexico. Discovered in 2000; some of these crystals are 36 feet in length, this cave is 950 feet below the surface, it is a whopping 120 F, the heat and water have allowed the gypsum to form into massive moon-white beams.
Article: Neil Shae Photo: Speleoresearch & Films, La Venta

Circular patches of barren soil on the edge of the Namib Desert. "Cryptic Desert Dimples" these circles are also so known as "fairy rings". Biochemist Carl Albrecht is close to proving what other scientists think these are: Termites are to blame.

Photo: Richard Du Toit

WOW!! It has been a few days since posting... I have missed so much. :) I can not come up with any profound words, hey, having problems even spelling it, so I will leave you with this...

Gone Greeen?

If you have implemented any "Gone Green" ways in your life, please share with us. :)

* I found these 2 photos in this months National Geographic... I absolutely love this magazine and just as my Dad shared it with me, we love sharing it with Hannah (she just loves it too!). Something else... I better not!!! The end! :) I wish you all could see my face as I am conflicted about this, to post or not, that is the question?! LOL I think I have finally lost it!!

Wifeness...

How did I get here…

Well, 3 years of Todd being on the road has taken a toll on my wifeness. (like that one?!) I already had a huge problem with being a “submissive” wife, but add 3 years of trying to be a submissive wife 3 days a week, single mom 4 days a week and so on, watch out wifeness. We talk everyday on the phone and he has had to give me a lot of the decision making power while he is on the road, but it is much easier to keep myself in the role of being a submissive wife when he is home. I am an all or nothing kinda gal and that is something I pray to God about all the time. I am his wife ALL the time, not just 3 days a week and those old habits of being head strong and single minded creep in.

This morning Christina lead me to a blog about just this subject and WOW, it is there in black and white what a submissive wife is, should do. (Not like it isn't in black and white in the Bible, duh!!) I could count too many of them for myself that I falter at.

One of the on going disagreements we have had throughout our marriage is that I give of myself to much so too other people and not enough to us. I always disagree and believe that to be one of my strong suits; great friend, willingness to do for others, help always, etc. But… by the time I get home, I have nothing left for the moment for us. It has just been in the last year that it has hit me that I need to change this and that, oh my gosh, he is right… moderation, I can still help, but in moderation. J If it is something that we have disagreed on for 8 years, I guess you could say, Hello, Windy, are you listening to me, it is God, Knock, Knock… Learn to change it. (Ok, a little head strong, but I can change that too!)

I love my husband and 100% appreciate the Great Husband and Father that he is… and I pray to God that he will strengthen my desire to be the mate, partner, wife, team member, that he needs me to be.

Wanted to share this…:)

Coffee with the Girls...

Good Morning Ladies and...

After cleaning the house this morning I sat down and was done (for right now at least...). All my chores were done, and my mind started to run a little. It made me think of the days when we had a coffee group of moms that would get together on Mondays for Coffee, Boy, how I miss that. All of our lives have gotten busy with going back to work or school, some of us went to homeschooling, or we just had other things to do! :( We use to discuss the most obscure things to the topic of the moment (politics, schooling, etc.), it was fabulous.

I think my mind is starting to kick into school mode and substance is what is calling for. I need to get back to reading more, having grown up talk :), and more. HEEHEHEHE... oh no, I am having a moment. lol So, anyone, anyone start a subject. I can't even think of one... lol

Ok... here is something:

Something that champs my hide is that they don't make "Talls" for children. Hannah has such long legs that the size around the waist doesn't match the length she needs. I try slims, the pants with the adjustable waist, everything and they just don't work. She is a 6 to 7 waist and a 10 length, you could fit two of her in those pants that fit her length wise!! So now she has a great collection of belts, but not always does she like to wear them ( I cant say that I blame her!), plus they are so baggy in the legs. So I am calling on all children's clothes manufactured to consider, strike that, to make talls!! I think I have this frustration every time I go clothes shopping, so please, excuse me and my frustration!! :)

What books are you all reading? Maybe I need a new book to read.

Have a great morning ladies!!

Birth Stories

I had mentioned in one of comments about Hannah being born in the water and we thought it would be neat to share birth stories... So, if you would like to, please, share your birth stories. We attribute a lot of the calmness Hannah has, and has had since day one, to the environment in which she was born.

Hannah was born at the Birth Center near us and it was a very loving and homey environment. We had the place to ourselves (no other mom's having babies that day) and the full attention of our midwife, nurse and doula. It was fabulous!!!

They were to have gotten the birthing tub installed by then and it was delayed. What a bummer I thought. Well, as the day and labor went on, they decided to put me in the reg. tub to relax and refresh... Once in there, there were NOT getting me out!!! It was tremendous, the pain was diminished and I was able to sleep in between contractions (very welcomed rest considering I had 27 hours of unmediated labor...;) ).

Hannah made her entrance into this world surrounded by love... warmth... no loud noises... candle light only and Mom's hands only. The midwife guided her head out, but aloud me to bring her to my chest. It was the most awesome and empowering experience ever!!

That is our birth experience (condensed version) and we would love to share yours.

Getting back to it and does it feeeeelll goood!

This weekend we are just getting stuff done. Todd and his friends are going to try and get the engine back in the jeep, thank goodness, Hannah and I have been doing deep cleaning, I am preparing my final list for shopping this week and most of all, getting back to a routine. :) I washed our shower curtain today, deep cleaned the laundry room and freezers.... Then it happened.

Todd and Hannah called me from Wal-Mart... Mom guess what, you know that lady from church, she is giving away Golden Retriever puppies. (I had to give up my GR in Wyoming when I got divorced... the place I moved to would not let me have dogs and I was able to find a really good home for him.) So, now it is a waiting game to see if they bring one home. :) I will keep you posted.

They are watching you... Eat your vegetables and fruits!!

Snack time today at our house... fresh peaches, apples, peanut butter and whole wheat crackers, yummy!

I have to post something about this... I was reading my dear cousin-in-laws blog this morning and sadness for our nation struck me like a ton of bricks. If you get a chance take a look and read her post for today, it will make you think and cry (it did me).

Our children's health is failing in America and it brings up many emotions. I want to save them all!! Why is it OK with Society to raise kids to be addicted to video games, junk food and really awful TV, theres more...?! I do not have the answers by any means, but I remember yesteryear and how did we get to where we are in such a short time?

I have my food issues, and boy am I aware of them and how I do not want to pass them on to Hannah. I am learning to balance that fear with a healthier way of living with food and hopefully Hannah will not have the same struggles. She loves her fruits, veggies and water, thank God for that!

"Lead by example!", is a phrase that is big in our house in so many ways... That is what needs to be done; Schools, adults, Society, and so on, lead by example. Confusing, to say the least, how can we change this? One person at a time.

I am adding a few links to the side bar and different food programs that schools can adopt and other information.

PS. Please keep Vicki and Joey in your prayers... they both need help from God to change their eating for the sake of life.

A new appreciation... in multiple ways!

I would like to Thank all of you, but especially Debi...

Through her photo a day blog, she gave me the inspiration to see something new in our surroundings each and every day.

Thank you Debi, my Blog Soul Sista!!

The beginning of this year I was really feeling yucky about AZ again. (I go through my spurts) Now, I have a brand new appreciation because of the eye of the camera (thanks to Debi)... I know this may sound a little, uuummm, not sure, but it has left me thinking, WOW, amazing... We revisited all of our photos from the last few months and it is truly amazing! An example... the centrury blooming, we know people who have lived here for the entire life and haven't seen that, but we got to this year. That is truly amazing! Mailboxes, who would have thought that would help me, but it has... look at how diverse and creative people are here. :) I could go on and on. I have seen the beauty and I know I better for the change. :)

I know what it is... dirt, dirt and more dirt, but when the desert comes a live, outstanding!!! I can hardly wait for winter again so I can find another new appreciation of our surroundings!

So thank you to all!!

My "H" has finally fallen off!

(Boy do I need to clean the scanner...yuck)

Ok, this is going to be silly... But, I have been having trouble with my "H" for several months now and finally, it has fallen off. I must type Hannah's name a lot. LOL In some ways it makes it easier and in the oters a bit difficult. It slows my typing down because I stop and look to make sure I hit the white knob right. :) O, well, so if I am missing any "H"'s please forgive me. My computer husband doesnt get home till late and then maybe he will fix it for me. :) I told you this was going to be silly...

The End of Summer is upon us...

Hi everyone!! First, I need to apologize for the ranting I did on the dish washing thing... Step away from the computer when frustrated!!! :) Thank you all for appeasing my ranting and participating in the poll, it is fun to see others opinions and Hannah has been very comical about the situation.

Well, the end of Summer is upon us and we will be wrapping up the summer with some fun things... Tomorrow we will get to go to the cove (water park like fun) and weekly rodeo (Hannah's new fascination), then on Sat. we will be going to our new favorite place, Gallery of Dreams, for an albaster rock carving class and Sunday to another favorite place, Apple Annies Orchard, to pick some fresh fruit and vegetables and Peach Mania.

A celebration of Willcox peaches, featuring tree-ripened pick your own peaches! The 10th annual Peach Mania Festival starts with a delicious "All You Can Eat" pancake with peaches breakfast served from 6:30 AM- 10:30 AM each day. Experience the fun of eating a juicy peach right off the tree; take a free hayride around the orchard and pick your own peaches, apples and Asian pears. The Peach Pavilion features free samples of dozens of our tasty peach products.
Sit in the shade of our peach orchard and enjoy a slice of homemade peach pie or a bowl of homemade peach ice cream. Apple-smoked burger lunches will be served daily from 11:00 AM - 5:00 PM. Enjoy hot roasted sweet corn at our farm location. A perfect way to spend a emorable day with family and friends!" www.appleannies.com

Wow wee... I can hardly wait for those pictures, the fun and the yummy pancakes. :)

Oh, I almost forgot!! 10 more books sold this week... only 1450 more to go. LOL

A poll...

On the side bar is a poll... Hannah and I wondering how many times do you have to do dishes a day. Picture this, I do dishes 4 x a day or roughly and Michael does help too. But, today, EVERY SINGLE CUP in the house was dirty at dinner and I only have one biological child!! :) How does this happen? So, as I made the kids that were here aware that I was upset... I asked Hannah how many dishes do you think other people do? Silly question and really I can solve this, but have been a little lax (?) on the subject. Oh well enough rants for now... :) I thought this would just interesting for the both of us.

Looky what I got for my Birthday...

Look at this beautiful banner... Debi made it for my birthday!! Thank you so much!! It sure says it all, right there at the top of the blog...

Thank you Debi and the all of the rest of you! This birthday has been made special!